Do You Love Me Enough?

I was listening to NPR and this fella was telling the story of his sister being in hospice.  He told of how he sat in her room, holding his beloved sister's hand, telling her how much he loved her. As he proclaimed his love for his dying sister, she asked him, "Do you love me enough to trade places with me?"

That stopped me in my tracks and made the rest of the story a blur. He felt very awkward about his answer, so he made a joke about her having to be married to his wife, but what a truly deep question.

"Do you love me enough to trade places with me?"

I remember when my granddaughter Evelyn was born.  She had a difficult time breathing at first, and she required some special care.  Her father (my son, Jordan) is a professional tuba player.  His lung capacity is beyond that of normal humans, yet his baby girl struggled to fully inflate her lungs.  His desire to take her place was palpable.  It was also beautiful.  It's what real love looks like.

"Do you love me enough to trade places with me?"

I think of my own sweet kids, and the times when they had stitches or fevers, or the chicken pox.  I would have gladly taken on that discomfort to ease their pain. I think of poor Luke, when I was in labor all those times.  I'm sure he would have taken my pain, if it was in his power to do so. (Well, once, anyway.)    

At so many points in my life, without saying these exact words, I have had this conversation with Jesus.  

When the baby we created out of love died inside my body, the devastation was crushing my very soul. I may have asked him,"Do you love me enough to trade places with me?"

When I was lost in my brokenness, and couldn't find a friend.  When I couldn't feel loved enough and couldn't feel whole enough, I may have asked him, "Do you love me enough to trade places with me?"

Too stubborn to change, and insisting on doing things my way instead of his, I have broken his heart and his promises too many times to count. Yet, I STILL have the audacity to ask him, "Do you love me enough to trade places with me?"

Nearly 2,000 years ago, he knew me already.  (He's God.  He can do that.) He knew what I would ask, and he said, "Yes, Amy.  As a matter of fact, I do."  Then he took flesh and suffered loneliness and frustration and sadness.  He mourned and felt his soul crushing as his friends turned away and the ones he came to save rejected him.  He took to the cross and died, Because He loves me enough to trade places with me.

It could have ended there, but it didn't. Now, He asks the question.

"Do I love Him enough to trade places with him?"

Look to the manger and answer that one.

Look to the cross and answer it again.

Now look to the Resurrection.

"Do you love me enough to trade places with me?"

 He does.  He did.  He has.  He always will.