My friend told me to think of your life like a car driving at night. "You can't see any further ahead than your headlights."
This totally rubbed me the wrong way, since I am incredibly GIFTED at worrying about the things to come. Not that I worry for no good reason, I am a sensible worrier. I mean, I don't worry about the whole Mayan Apocolypse, or Zombies or anything senseless like that.
However, I was given the most incredible blessing of being the mother of 7 great kids. Hence the worrying.
Some of this worry is indeed, beyond the scope of my headlights. I can't do much for my children when they are grown or when we are apart from each other. I can't make my grown kids brush their teeth. (I trust Jordan's wife makes him do that now.)I can't make them change their socks. I can't make them make good choices. Sometimes, for no really good reason, they will cheer for the wrong football team. (Sometimes that team will even win a game, which STILL does not make it appropriate to say "Roll Tide" at the dinner table.) I can't make the girls actually sleep when they have a sleepover at Aunt Chris's house, or Aunt Jenni's. I can't keep them from trying a drink or a joint. I can encourage them in the right direction, but the decision is ultimately theirs. (And, kids, if you're reading this, KNOW that I will find out and that you WILL NOT like the consequences!)
What worries me is that I can't keep them from harm.
Before they lived in Alabama or Kentucky or Louisiana, or even Michigan, they lived in my heart (and places south of that) and that makes my kids like the objects in my side mirror: CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR. At the moment, I have children in three states. In the next few months, I will have children in three different countries. No matter where they are, they are always in my heart first.
When my sons deploy, I will worry.
I will also remind myself that they are closer than they appear. I hope they will remember that I am closer than I seem also. It's hard to cuddle with half of a DNA strand, but just know I'm there, and not just me.
Our Creator is closer than he appears also. The one who loves us most. The one who can see beyond the headlights. The one who tells us that we can't change a single hair on our heads by worrying.
Alright. So I guess I'll just be happy with what I can see right now, knowing that Love is much MUCH closer than it appears.